what are words - chris medina

Anywhere you are, I am near
Anywhere you go, I’ll be there
Anytime you whisper my name, you’ll see
How every single promise I keep
Cause what kind of guy would I be
If I was to leave when you need me most
What are words
If you really don’t mean them
When you say them
What are words
If they’re only for good times
Then they don’t
When it’s love
Yeah, you say them out-loud those words
They never go away
They live on, even when we’re gone
And I know an angel was sent just for me
And I know I’m meant to be where I am
And I’m gonna be standing right beside her tonight
And I’m gonna be by your side
I would never leave when she needs me most
Yeah, you say them out-loud those words
And I’m gonna be here forever more
Every single promise I keep
I’m forever keeping my angel close

i gave up totally... i dont know how to deal with this anymore... having to cry everynight... i dont know how to deal with this arguement/quarrels anymore... i really dont... i tried to give you my everything... i tried to hold back my temper to you tried to talk things out with you... but whenever its about him... things will be like a time bomb... it will exploded by itself anytime...

today all the conversation that i have with you... all the words you typed its like millions of knifes stabbing into my heart... its hurt so badly... WHY?! why you sacrifise him but at the same time cant forget him?! do you even realised that hes already your everything? WHY?! why tell me that im still important and tell me no one can ever replace when he already did! WHY?!

i never thought that i will need to go through a love thats bitter than sweet... i never thought that love will be this bitter... it filled with nothing but tears... really disappointed... cause i thought things will be different with you... i tried to be an adult for you... i tried to hold back my temper and tried to change it... i went over my limit to do things for you... but no... to you it means nothing at least thats what i see...

its not that i dont see you do anything for me... i see it although i know its too late for all this... i appreciate it which i dont in the past... but no... it doesnt change anything... i just want to stand a bit more in your heart... but no... he filled it all up... why cant you see what i want from you? i guess you will never be... just like to you... i will never know whats in your mind... i guess you are right... things will never work out between us... this love is a mistake from the start... i shouldnt have brought it this far... which breaks both of our heart...

baby girl... i still remember... never forget... what i said to you earlier on... your heart is too precious for me to break... im sorry that i broke all these promises and shatter your heart into pieces... its never my intention... i hope this time you will believe...

just want you to know... yes you sacrifice everything for me including the one who you love more than me previously... but by the things you are doing now due to him... you are at the risk of losing me now too... then whats the purpose of sacrificing for me earlier on? you are going to sacrifice me too... so... please... dont say anymore about how you sacrifice so much for me because im more important or im special and mean a lot to you anymore... cause right now... whatever you do... its a fact you are protecting him more than me now by the way we argue/quarrel... and its a fact that im not as special and important... cause you can sacrifice me as well in a way... it hurts even more when yes i hurt you and im regretting so fking badly that i cant move myself out from that issue... but no knowing that you are sacrificing me now hurts the most with what you said about sacrificing for me...

its not that im leaving... neither will i until the day you ask me to... because i love you... but this 3 words... i bet i wouldnt say it to you anymore already... cause this 3 words suppose to be sweet and make our love grow... but its not the case now... each time when i say this to you... yes i mean it... from my heart... i do feel the sweetest... but at the same time i feel the pain as well... as i know the more im falling for you the more hurt i will need to go through... worse than the one i got on 3 sept and everything before that...

remember what i said to you? i will walk this tough and rocky road with you... till you heal... i know theres a slight chance that at the end of this journey... we might not be together... but yes its ok... i just want to mend your broken heart for you... cause im the main reason why things became this way... and i will always bear in mind... that my short temper will cause me to lose the one i love... which is true cause this is what happen now...

Whataya Want From Me - Adam Lambert

Hey, slow it down
Whataya want from me
Whataya want from me
Yeah, I'm afraid
Whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

There might have been a time
When I would give myself away
(Ooh) Once upon a time
I didn't give a damn
But now here we are
So whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

Just don't give up
I'm workin' it out
Please don't give in
I won't let you down
It messed me up, need a second to breathe
Just keep coming around
Hey, whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

Yeah, it's plain to see
That baby you're beautiful
And there's nothing wrong with you
It's me – I'm a freak
But thanks for lovin' me
Cause you're doing it perfectly

Yeah There might have been a time
When I would let you slip away
I wouldn't even try but I think
You could save my life

Just don't give up
I'm workin' it out
Please don't give in
I won't let you down
It messed me up, need a second to breathe
Just keep coming around
Hey, whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

Just don't give up on me
I won't let you down
No, I won't let you down

So
Just don't give up
I'm workin' it out
Please don't give in
I won't let you down
It messed me up, need a second to breathe
Just keep coming around
Hey, whataya want from me

Just don't give up
I'm workin' it out
Please don't give in
I won't let you down
It messed me up, need a second to breathe
Just keep coming around
Hey, whataya want from me
(Whataya want from me)
Whataya want from me
Whataya want from me

now you got what you want... and im back to square one...
i hope you are happier this time...
all the promise from you i will keep it in my heart... and all the promise from me to you i will break it all up...
i will never let you know how much i love you anymore...
i will never let you know how much i will tear for you...
this time... i will disappear from your life like previous time...
i thanks you... for appearing in my life...
i thanks you... for saying i love you and good bye...
do take good care of yourself my love...

everythings back to square one... i dont know why it still hurt so much... this feeling its just like before... the scar is getting deeper and that kind of pain is still so unbearable... i dont know how to live my life now... its not going anywhere... i couldnt stop crying... i could feel my heart beat stop and the knife that stab through... it hurt very badly... and seems like worse than before...

baby girl... its never my intention to leave... never... but i know... someday... you will be happier... that i letted you go for that someone who is really fit to be that special one in your heart... i love you baby girl... even at this point of time i still love you so... sorry... take care...

staring at this spider web cob blog... suddenly all the words that i have in me... just stuck at my mind my throat... i dont know where to start neither do i know how should i start... theres so much things i want to say... but at the same time i dont know if its right to even say...

its going to be a year in m1... time flies real fast... i thought i wouldnt be able to make it in this tough job... but im going to complete my contract soon in this company in april... a company which is good and bad at the same time... i enjoyed myself a lot in this company i dont deny... i meet new people... nice customers... good manager... but also at the same time... people who is fucked up... bad experience... bad high stress level kind of job... =/ oh well... this is working life... i guess... a society that i need to overcome with all my ability... even if i cant... i still have to learn to overcome... this is the only way that i can survive irregardless where im going to be at... nevertheless... people come and people go... just like the earth will never stop rotate with or without that particular someone...

was reading through baobeis blog just now... and it reminds me a lot of the past that i used to have... ya... used to have... cause now im not playing around neither mi flirting any-oh-how... =) cause me and my baby girl is going on our journey for the second year soon in the coming august... and thats fast... i never with someone for so long... the feeling still stay so strong... although the time together for us is like getting shorter and shorter... but i got to believe in her... i got to believe in us and the love between us... all the ups and downs that we been through... up till now... i still believe its tests from god that want us to go through together... to being our love strong at the end of the day... baby girl... i dont know if you will still read this stupid blog of my... but yes... i want to shout out this to you... i love you laopo... i still love you the same way as i do since 250808... *muacks... nothing and no one will ever replace you... this is going to be deep in my heart always... i know... =)*

although yes i admit... sometimes im mean sometimes im nasty towards baby girl... and baby girl still tolerate all the shit from me... but im not happy... say im crazy say im mad... i... sometimes... just want to hear how baby girl angry with me... :x yes thats how crazy im... cause i want to know how much baby girl still love me... =( the insecure that i got from her... i fear... i dont want to go through again the days that she left me for him... i dont want anymore... everytime... each time i can get hold of baby girl... i never never thought of letting go... many times... i wish i could hug her tight... tight tight by my side... i cant wait... i really cant wait for my own house to come... so that baby girl can be part of my room again... just like before... being part of my life and never leave me again... i believe and hope that day would come... and till then... i will start saving all my money and fulfil all my promises to her... =)

next month im going hongkong for twins darlings concert le... i wish baby girl could come with me too... but again... money is the issue here... i dont blame baby girl... but i hope baby girl will feel that even though im physically in hongkong... my heart is still with her... =) i cant wait for that day to come... and im going jb tomorrow!!! with mummy... hehe... and then on the 16 will be with baby girl... hehe... been a long time since i last spend my time with baby girl... =( miss her lots!!! i cant wait cant wait cant wait... =) and then im going to spend my august with baby girl... our big big day... =)

i know when baby girl not with me that period of time... i still any-oh-how with other girl girl like kimberly ng/karla and li juan... =( but really theres nothing between me and them anymore... sometimes i just dont know how to tell baby girl that... hai... really trouble me a lot for this kind of issue... =(

anyway... whatever it is... my heart for baby girl will never change... cause even after so long... after playing for so long... the one i love is still baby girl... =)

haru haru - big bang

Leave
Yeah, Finally I realize that I am nothing without you
I was so wrong, forgive me
Ah ah ah ah~

My broken heart like a wave
My shaken heart like a wind
My heart vanished like smoke
It can't be removed like a tattoo
I sigh deeply as if a ground is going to cave in
Only dusts are piled up in my mind
(say goodbye)

Yeah, I thought I wouldn't be able to live even one day without you
But somehow I managed to live on (longer) than I thought
You don't answer anything as I cry out "I miss you"
I hope for a vain expectation but now it's useless

What is it about that person next to you, did he make you cry?
Dear can you even see me, did you forget completely?
I am worried, I feel anxiety because I can't get close nor try to talk to you
I spend long nights by myself, erasing my thoughts a thousand times

[Chorus]

Don't look back and leaveDon't find me again and live (on)
Because I have no regrets from loving you, take only the good memories
I can bear it in some way
I can stand in some way
You should be happy if you are like this
I become dull day by day (eh eh eh eh)
Oh girl I cry, cry
You're my all, say goodbye...

If we pass by each other on the street
Act like you didn't see me and go the way you were walking to
If you keep thinking about our past memories
I might go look for you secretly

Always be happy with him, (so) I won't ever get a different mind
Even smallest regret won't be left out ever
Please live well as if I should feel jealous
You should always be like that bright sky, like that white cloud
Yes, you should always smile like that as if nothing happened

[Chorus]

I hope your heart fees relieved
Please forget about me and live (on)
Those tears will dry completely
As time passes by
It would've hurt less if we didn't meet at all (mm)
Hope you will bury our promise of being together forever baby
I pray for you

[Chorus]

Oh girl I cry, cry
You're my all, say goodbye, bye
Oh my love don't lie, lie
You're my heart, say goodbye

xiaobee/alfred
25/11/88
single

bicycle
cameron highland trip
cigarette case
class 3 licence
digital camera/DSLR
diploma in biotechnology
genting trip
home & room of my own
hongkong trip
improve drinking
more bottom
more ear stud
more money
more shoes
more time
more tongue stud
more top
nds
new bag
new wallet
sports attire
to be happy
volkswagen beatle
watches
zippo

angela yang aka 杨老师
dashimon
eionn aka donkey
eionn aka donkey shop
felicia aka xiaolaopo
jasmine
liling aka doudou
michelle aka mic
michelle
pauline aka porpor
pearline
qingwen aka wen meimei
shanling
wanxuan aka xuan
weiqi aka vicky